Reality Check!

So I am sat here thinking that every new ache or pain is something worse than before and wondering why I have the pains and worrying that the operation was not successful. I go for a walk, I feel dizzy but that is to be expected. The wind blows and I imagine myself on the water in charge of a windsurfer, pulling in and gliding over the water. The sun is in my face, I struggle to cross the road and I exit into the park, the sun is strong but the frosty dew is still visable on the grass and the fence. The lake is almost part of the land, it is surreal to see a couple of swans standing together on the lake having a chat. I feel better now the aches are not there anymore for now and I head back to home feeling I could walk for ages but knowing this is the first time out since the operation, then I tell myself not to be so stupid, the operation is over the wound is healing, lets just get on with it quickly, run, jump, throw your neck in the air turn it left and right. All this is in my head you understand. I return home felling good feeling that the operation was not significant and wondering when can I return to work. I answer emails and click on an email on behalf of the head of the Faculty at the University Rosie. I click to open thinking that it is something to do with my deferral and I have missed out an important part of the form. My stomach turns when I read that she has died suddenly after undergoing a routine operation. Died, I only emailed her a couple of weeks previously to say good luck. Died, I only talked to her last semester concerning my neck and she her knees. Died, I only talked to other lecturers about how she was lucky to get in and have her operation done so quickly. I only met her once, but I will remember her for ever. Dr. Rosie Turner-Bissett.