Tuesday the end of March

I can't believe it is the end of March, it has been so long since I was at work that I feel a little apprehensive about when I go back which hope will be soon!
On Saturday I went to Edinburgh as it was a friends birthday, he was revisiting the City after having his Stag Night there 10 years previously. We marvelled at the architecture of the Cafe Royal if you have never been then you have missed out it is truly remarkable. We went for lunch at a lovely vegetarian place called Hendersons The staff very very friendly and informative answering the questions of the people who were not au fait with vegetarian food.
The trip back was eventful and informative. We sat next to a couple and father of the man from Iraq. It is amazing that talking to actual people gives you a better understanding of what is happening in that country. Very appropriate today as Britain hands over to the Iraqi army and begins it long awaited withdrawal from the country. The end of the day I was really hurting in my neck and I hope I have not done any damage, I am being so careful but do not want to just sit in the house all day and not move. My walking is being seriously curtailed as I have developed a problem with my leg it really hurts after about 1Km the doctors doesn't think it is DVT but my ankles are swollen and this is something I have never had. I have put on about 15kg since September 2008 and I am getting worried I do not eat fatty foods and am careful not to eat in between but getting now real exercise is a worry shame the health personnel don't seem to share my worry but that is another story. I am recording my workouts on the MapMyRide which is at least keeping me focussed. I can't wait to get back to work!

Friday Lunch

Hey Had a great day today, went to the docs as I had a raging pain in my leg I of course thought it was DVT and so the Doc took some blood and said he thought it was probably just a muscle strain would you believe it the only exercise I can do and I go and strain a muscle!!!!!!
Anyway I met up with my mate Gerry and we went into town and had a lovely lunch at the Olive and Bean very good relaxed atmosphere loved the big farmhouse kitchen table. We then did M&S and Gerry managed to buy a jacket in the sale I couldn't find one to fit but the reductions were great £99 down to £25 :) We wander lonely as a cloud until the Bachus beckoned and a pint of Draught Peroni only place I know that sells it. That was enough so back home and rest what a day feel really good.

Mothers Day

Well this comes once a year and it is here this year. I remember my mother and wish for her to still be alive but I realised long ago that some things are just not possible and just get on with it now. It is good to see the girls celebrate this day with their mother and although Louise is not at home she is still part of things and she telephoned to say happy Mday. Maria did well creating a montage of photos and I downloaded Jim Reeves fro her and made an A4 page with picture and tracks on. I have kept out of the way as I know I am getting to her so best to just lay low and keep quiet hence the blog. I am listening to Jewel at the moment forgot how good she is well a day! I don't know whether I should have bought flowers or not, in the end I didn't, perhaps I made the wrong choice! Neck pain still here so what's new. I am not going to go one about it but I am so missing going to work it is crazy. It goes to show that you need things to do and again hence the blog. That's enough now I don't even know what has go on in the world today I spent an inordinate amount of time You Tubing Flight of the Condors and swimming under water now where does that go I need to surf more to become conversant with what the YOOF of today are talking about and looking at and contributing to.  Forgot how  good Foolish Games from Jewel was excellent.  Enough enough!

Week 7 post op

Still got pain in my neck and have been told that I am not to do exercise until the consultant tells me it is OK no lifting or strenuous work including driving. So that is me told. My allegiances were torn last night between Manchester City and Aalborg as Bodil is Danish what a boring game until the last 10 minutes. I feel sorry for Aalborg as they did work hard to get back into the game it would have been a better game if they had done this earlier, maybe next year they wil do even better.

Absence makes the heart grow...............

Strange title you might think but Maria my youngest daughter (16) has just got scan results back from an EEG which hint at a problem in the left temporal lobe which may be causing her to have seizures. Now she has been having incidents for coming up to 3 years but this was put down to panic attacks this is week three and she has had 5 so far the last one was totally different from the rest as she began screaming at the top of her voice and holding her head even biting one of her friends. Although I wasn't there, I heard her screaming as her friend telephoned to say she had phoned for an ambulance. If it is confirmed as epilepsy then we will have to live with that and cope accordingly. This year is an important year for her but we have stressed that exams can be taken at anytime, health is far more important. I also finally talked to the Practice Nurse regarding my neck and she basically said under no condition lift anything or do any exercise other than walking until I have my appointment at the end of April. This has somewhat scuppered my idea of getting back to work sooner than expected. To be honest it has shocked me a bit as I suppose I have just thought of the operation as something to be done and then get on with things the way they were, it seems that is not the case. So I will do what I am told and only walk for exercise and keep taking the tablets until told otherwise. Cervical Discectomy

Belonging to a Religious philosophy

When I went for my neck operation I had to fill in a variety of forms and answer a lot of questions which were personal. I was asked what religion I was and I answered (for the first time ever) NONE. Now this may not be significant to most people but for me it was totally significant because I am the typical Irish Roman Catholic of the 1950's where the Church ruled with a mighty hand and no one questioned its authority. I was born out of wedlock as they say and although I missed certain things growing up like how to put a tie on correctly and how to effectively shave I don't think I missed out on much. My mother and Grandmother both matriarchs in their own way saw to that and I had a good upbringing with not much money. However I was invested into the church, I was an Alter-boy, I went on retreat to the priesthood (thankfully they saw sense), and I was until college devout. When I was married ( in a Lutheran church by a female priest) and had a family I wanted my children brought up as Catholics and that was what happened. I attended church I taught in a Catholic school and I was involved very much in the activities of the church including festivals and certain rites within the church. 

Over the years though my disillusionment  grew and I began to really question what religion (any religion) was about and came to the conclusion that it was all about power over the masses and that no religious doctrine was true. I suppose I am an Atheist as I do not believe any religion has the truth only dogma but I do not resent people who believe and are devout in their religious practices. What I do resent is the "holier than thou" attitude of fundamentalists who would have you change your views to fit with theirs and here I just think of the early Christians working in missions to change the ancestral religions of indigenous  people. I ask how could they if not to maintain power over the people and subjugate them to terror until they changed their belief systems. If that is what a god wants then I am not a follower. Now there are those who say that god is good and that they have been helped by him/her/it well if they belief that then so be it but it would be nice to be able to hold beliefs contrary to the populous and thereby be out of the power struggle. This brings me to my point, there is a movement which started as a joke but has turned into a tidal wave of support of the idea of "de-baptism"  What I can't understand is that for those who do not want to be baptized why they have to have an official note saying they are not baptised. If they don't believe then their non believing should be proof enough, it is like they want permission to not belong. For me it is enough that I have questioned the validity of religion and decided that it is not for me. I am not a different person as far as my relationships with others are concerned but I am a totally different person within myself as I do not have to adhere to petty dogma designed to control the way I think. This is surely a good thing. My family are as dear to me as they have always been and I have not thrown off the shackles of confinement and behaved in a totally non rational way I have just carried on doing what I do in the way I have always done it minus the influence of religion or as much as I can possibly do this having been influenced for a life time by its conventions. I do not adhere to hypocrisy I merely try to do the best I can for those who need it and hope that they will do the same for me.

The following link started all this

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7941817.stm

6th Week Post Op

Well this is the start of the sixth week after my neck operation. I am sure that the recovery is underway but I am still getting lots of pain and I have not yet got full mobility in my arms which is worrying. After talking to friends I rang the hospital to talk over what my options were vis a vis doing any exercises so that I am able to return to work. I rang on Thursday, the nurse did not ring back I rang on Friday and the Nurse has not rung back so I am now having to wait until Monday to get something back from them. All I want to know is: Is the pain I am feeling normal? Is it normal to be dizzy so long after the operation? What can I do to stop gaining weight in terms of exercise? It is this latter point that is getting me as I want to be windsurfing again and feel frustrated. I really want to be back to work as soon as I can but I do not want to do anything that will jeopardise my getting back to work. I will just have to grin and bear it I suppose.

Week 5 Post Op

Well this is the week that all things should happen! It doesn't feel like it though, I have pain across my shoulders and still the pain down the arms. I wish it was sorted.
I am just listening to the Arsenal - Burnley game and wondering if Burnley can win. It doesn't look like it as Arsenal have just scored a goal :( It could be a winner and see the last of Burnley in the FA Cup. I am sure it will be sorted at some point I can still hope Burnley can do the business.
I am really missing work and I have been pondering going back and getting into the swing of things but I am really unsure I would hate to get back to work and find that I had done it too early and end up being off again. I am sure they are coping brilliantly without me but I would still like to be back in the thick of things.

Day after yesterday

I spent this morning updating the Dell laptop with Microsoft updates and using defraggler to make sure everything was in its place. I don't understand my difficulty with my laptop it seems to not display FIrefox when you click on it then I tried to download firefox and it says there is a version running but it is not in the task manger so I don't know then when you shutdown it asks if you want to end firefox, it is really strange and I panicked because all my bookmarks are on firefox. I have now inported them into Safari which seems to work well and into Google Chrome I am taking no chances with this stuff. I have been out for a short walk I hope to be able to catch some football as the University has sports afternoon on Wednesday but I was too early they were only just setting up and kicking around, some of the players looked really good. I am three says into my weight loss regime I was upset that I had gained 4 Kilos so I now weigh 97 Kilos which is way too much and my BMI makes me officially overweight something I have never been in my life so I am really watching what I eat. So usually Bran flakes and banana for breakfast, egg on rye for dinner except today I had some left over rice and carrots from last night so I put a little sunflower in the pan and stir fried them together and I used the sauce what was left just to bind it and tonight I will have something easy. then not in between meal snacks if I do feel hungry I have bought some dried raisins and currents so no fat there and If I really want something there are crumpets in the cupboard. I have cut out white or even brown sliced bread so far and it has not been hard I have not had any chocolate or peanut butter and I have not touched any bisquits not that I did before but occasionally I would put the spread on bread or have a couple of biccys as you do but no more. I am aching to get doing more excerise but a do not want to do anything I shouldn't swimming and bike riding would be ideal I am sure but both put a strain on the neck so I'd better just stick to walking.

3 weeks 2 days post op Buses and Firefox and MERITS

It has been quite a bit now since the op and I am still having trouble with my arms. I still get the same pains, I can move my neck to a point and then it hits a "bollard" and that is it. I really hope this state of play sorts it self out as the Hospital said by week 6.

I went for a long walk to day firstly to post some letters but I went a long way around. Then I read that one of my module assignments had come back and was ready to pick up. As I also needed to take a library book

back I thought I would go into town.

I wasn't going to walk in but as I was 20 metres from the bus stop it arrived and as I got 5 metres from the stop it departed so I walked to the main road into town and then decided to walk into the University.

I had my big coat on and a fleece and although it was cold outside I was really warm in fact I will have to have a breathable fleece as I was really sweating.

So I dropped the book off and went to the Faculty building to get my assignment. What a surprise I got when I read it, 67% that is really great as I had thought I had misunderstood a lot of what had been talked about but that is a merit and 3% short of a distinction considering I was incapasitated for most of the time at lectures I think that was brilliant I am so proud of myself, I didn't have anyone to share the moment with so I will wait til I get home to celebrate. I am using Google Chrome to publish this post and I am struggling on how toreduce the picture size. Also Firefox is playing up as I can't load up the browser I am also struggling with elements of the browser, I am not happy with Version 3

Recovery, Pain management and Weight gain

Woke up this morning after having had a great time at a friends house to see the England - Ireland rugby game ( less said the better)! Good company few drinks and little pain. The last time I had been to the house I lasted just over an hour before getting a taxi home because of the pain.
The conversation was good the company was good the laughs were excellent.
Now comes the downer, I had to resort to the dodgy pain killers which literally mess with my head but they do ease the pain. What could have caused it I don't know, had I slept in a strange position, the pain in the arms was back the numbness in the hands was back the pain across the shoulders was back! Just goes to show you can't take anything for granted. I have managed to float through the morning now with minimum pain but a feeling of strangeness which I don't like.
My local football team Newcastle upon Tyne have been beaten and I chose today to seriously cut down on my food intake so all in all not a good day.
I now weigh 95 kilos which has increased of late from 90 Kilos and I have decided to do something about it. I must admit I do put this rise down to my inactivity due to my slipped disc operation although I do tend to go for a walk each day. As a vegetarian I think I eat a minimal amount of fat. I have bran or porridge for breakfast with semi skimmed milk. I would eat cheese on toast for lunch or a boiled or fried egg. For dinner it will be some sort of pasta with a vegetarian sauce or veggie sausage and oven chips. Through the week I would have one night fried potatoes and mackeral or tomato soup. So I don't think I am gorging myself into oblivion but the fact remains I have put on weight and I know I have so I am now resigned to eating no bread but to have rye bread instead and to eat dried fruit if I need a snack and eat crumpets so I should cut the weight gain as long as I watch what I put on them :) My BMI has just shocked me as I scored 29.3 which means I am officially overweight so the new regime I am considering is worthwhile I am going to do this using Information Communication Technology (ICT) to chart my process so it will give me something to aim for and allow me to increase my ICT skills. That's what they call a "wake up call"